i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
found a ham sandwich in the elevator it tasted so hungry and it was still fresh. dont be mad at me. you know you love ham.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
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