Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
You know I told you about that hammering at 3 AM yesterday? Turns out it was Holly beating the lock out of her door with a mallet because she'd forgotten her keys.
Doesn't she keep a spare?
Drunk Holly doesn't listen to Sober Holly's plans.
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
It's 5am and I come home to you naked on the kitchen table and 3 people I never saw before fucking on the back porch ... and my weed gummy worms are gone. fuck you I'm taking your mom's offer
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
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