Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
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I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
I'm drunk off vodka and I haven't eaten today. I've never felt more like Kirsten Cohen in my life.
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So it's ironically funny that my psychiatrist's office and my cocaine dealer's house are on the same street
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
I showed up drunk and covered in glitter, smelling like stale booze and dirty stripper and my younger brother gave thanks his life wasn’t a shitshow like mine
That’s how my thanksgiving went
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