Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
my roommate just caught me washing a dildo in the sink.
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
Absolute soulmates or functional alcoholics?
Can't be the first without the last
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
This guy on Hoarders just said "we're all about 4 or 5 decisions away from shitting in a bucket". True dat
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
Randomize