So I just opened the bag you gave me and those panties aren't mine...
oh
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
peeing on that welcome mat was like, the highlight of my week
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
Getting day drunk before work is perfectly acceptable when its 99 cent margaritas.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
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