walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
In the middle of having sex with me, she reminded me that I was supposed to call my mom that morning. My penis has never retracted so quickly.
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
This santa hat i wore to the bar, served it's dual purpose as a vomit bag.
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Almost there.
define "almost". like I have enough time to watch a youtube video or oh shit, put on some goddamn pants because they're in the driveway.
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
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