did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
Well, I'm off to go seduce a gay man. In 10 years when I'm 300 pounds, sitting in a mumu surrounded by my 500 cats, remind me of this text. That way I can be like "ohhh THERE'S where I went wrong!!"
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
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