Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
You are the funniest drunk Jew I know. Never in my life have I witnessed someone respond, "Is your dick kosher?" while being picked-up on.
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
Last night I had a dream that I changed my last name to Vodka. what does that say about my life?
Dude I got in an Uber this morning and he goes “I drove you last night”\n“You got your dick sucked in the back seat”
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Randomize