I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
It doesn't feel like real life when you open your hotel room door and the first person you see is wearing a rabbit costume. I'm too hungover for this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
woke up, covered in gummy bears, with a note that said "the gummy army won"
Randomize