Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
come home now. i got a twizzler tangled in my hair again
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
Will you come get your son? He's using an old bike pump to help him fart the national anthem...
Randomize