so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
Just had to read the instructions to my microwave. How am I so high?
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
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