Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
I just told her she was a heartbeat above a blowup doll.
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
my dad just said 'either you're lying about your plans tonight or you kids are really lame nowadays'. maybe we should nix the singles saturday slumber party and go to a bar.
You texted the wrong number but that's probably the best call you'll ever make.
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a naked man in my car right now.
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
You had me at "let me see your balls"
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
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