dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
Well yesterday i made out with the entire football team and rifht at this very moment our waiter looks like a ken doll. Straight up. And he gave me wine so ill probly make out with him
college has opened so many doors for you
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
I'm going to fuck my way out of the friend zone if its the last thing I do
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Teeth make me feel like a dinosaur. Can you feel yours?
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
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