How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
and she was petting her beer can
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
What do I have to do to get you laid? I talked to that girl with the ugly dog for 45 minutes trying to get you in, and all you said was "Steven Spielberg is my favorite director."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you probably have like 11 voicemails from us, one is us singing my heart will go on while were fucking
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
Sorry bro I thought you were kidding. If I'm actually jerking off I usually said "Just a sec getting dressed" or something
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
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