That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
Turns out your granddad is cooler than you. We're taking him on our New year's eve pub crawl instead. Sorry.
Randomize