Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
I'm pretty sure I broke my breathalyzer by breathing vaporized vodka into it.
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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