By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
my mom just texted me to let me know that Hooters is hiring
i wish my mom had big dreams like that for me
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
If I stopped drinking I'd have to take up murdering.
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
It’s a dick. Seen one, seen em all. Unless it spews a fountain of tequila, I don’t need to see yours.
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