People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
last night a police horse bit me when i was wasted. even the animal kingdom knows i'm no good
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
MASS TEXT: Next weekend I will be in town for St. Patty's day. There will be a bonfire and liqour olympics. We will have booze but in order to participate it is byob. Upon arrival everyone will be asked to sign a waiver. I am not responsible for liver failure, death, loss of clothing or memory, bites, scratches, hickies, pregnancies, or any other for of injury you may obtain while participating. There will be ridiculous amounts of green glitter, be prepared to puke it up. ALSO WEAR SOMETHING GREEN OR YOU WILL BE PENALIZED!! AUTOMATIC 5 SHOTS. HAPPY GAMING!!!
I'm about to take plan-b with a glass of wine and ramen noodles. I cannot decide who will hurt more...my vagina, my kidneys or my pride.
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
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