let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
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Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
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I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
I'm drunk eating a quesadilla while this kid is tryina come over and I'm just like no. I want the quesadilla.
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
like, you weren't just lying there, you were wrapped in what appeared to be the skin of a wolf, chanting doomsday prophecies
THE END IS NEIGH
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
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