I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
Nothing says "welcome to Denver" like a hot 18 year old giving you directions to the dispensary and ending up blowing you in the backseat
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
Am I supposed to confront my 52-year-old boss/mother of 3 about the fact that we matched on Tinder?
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
Randomize