4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
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I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
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Timehop reminded me that 4 years ago today I helped a one armed man do the YMCA by being his other arm.
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
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