woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
4pm update. Theres smashed cake inside my duffel bag, a vodka bottle in the dish drainer, and the most productive thing ive done is make 40 pigs in a blanket
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
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