I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I may have appendicitis, but the house is like two blocks from the hospital so I'm just gonna go and drink anyway.
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
you are my patron saint of "too drunk for 9am". i just keep asking myself what would alyssa do as i try to regain motor function
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Winning the lottery was the best thing that ever happened to my penis.
Greatest pickup line ever: "We are out celebrating winning the lottery."
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
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