Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
Apparently drunk me was getting hit on and i wasn't into it so i shouted "Stupify" at him like i was fucking harry potter then went to the pizza place next to the bar and punted some guys pizza box out of his hands. :(
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Randomize