I accidentally burped into my bong.
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
You were saying you didn't want to go home and insisted that I drop you guys off at your uncles. That's how you ended up sleeping on a porch with two dudes
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
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