How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
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He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
Woke up at 4:30am to my little brother shaking me. Apparently I fell asleep naked on my kitchen table waiting for the toaster to pop. 2 years of college completed and i still havent learned my drinking limit...
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.
Really need a jack off emoji
Who do we write to about that?
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
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