OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
I am trying to think of a way to tell him about thanksgiving and the following weekend in a way that makes me sound funny and exciting and not like an alcoholic
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
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