you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
I just crashed on my couch and have no intention of ever getting up again
I will be over with a bedpan and beer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
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