Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know you're on vacation but you should know I just walk of shamed through a hotel lobby while leaving a threesome on Friday the 13th. Fuck superstition, I win.
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
Stoned, drunk, and walking into the library. Look at me multitasking!
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
Randomize