watching jon and kate + 8 right now is like watching my parents split up
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
You high fived me for banging your sister but lock me outta house bc I ate your pumpkin pie? Priorities bro
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
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