RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
My tweets this weekend consisted of me telling every bar I went to that they were my favorite valentine. I've never felt like more of an alcoholic
How the hell does my fucking boss know about the goddamned magician I fucked?!?
He tried to break dance on the island in the kitchen and ended up knocking over everyone's alcohol onto the floor then yelled "GUCCI" before vomiting
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
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