Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
I really hope jumping jacks prevent pregancy because I'm kind of banking on it right now, do you know why there's a unicycle in the corner of my room?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
You know something is wrong with your lifestyle when you have to clean easy Mac cheese powder off of your scale
at least it's not cocaine like last time
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