i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
I queefed so loud it echoed.
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
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he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
I forgot that I thought it would be a good idea to hairspray my toilet seat last night after I took 12 shots of vodka so when I just went to pee, I stuck to the toilet. Never drinking again.
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
My brother is coming home and he is bringing a whole bunch of friends with him. I am making him a cake. What should i put on it?
"Open for business" or "I have condoms" would probably work
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
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