i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
Do you remember when I jumped into your arms and you farted?
the snow is so cold on my vagina.
why do you have snow on your vagina?
vodka and heels.
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole.
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
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