I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
I'm taking the day off so I can get drunk at Whole Foods before noon
Are you texting me while pooping again?
I'm also playing fetch with the dog
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