I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
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Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
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tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
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