THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
I just saw a midget ride by on a scooter...wearing a bowtie and a helmet. My life is complete.
An alarm set every 45 minutes saying "FATTY" and one every afternoon saying "CASPER" every day until spring break is a foolproof plan to being bikini ready
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
She bit a glass in half.
I need someone to meet me at the end of the road and throw captain morgan at my face like they do with water at marathons
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
I'm either a high functioning alcoholic or I'm making the most of the fact that this is the last year that its socially acceptable to be black-out drunk five days a week.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
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