i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
Met the five year old's gym teacher for next year. He is an old drinking buddy and I used to fuck his older brother. It was like a walk of shame 20 years late.
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When theres a zombie apocalypse, i will be the only fat survivor. I ate chef boyardi ravioli with part of a pen for a fork
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
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