I just ate 3 burrito supremes and a crunchwrap...can't feel feet...I think I have diabetes
the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
that girl from work that wants to bone me just said 'the last time i went this long without sex was in jail'. sup, red flag
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am a murderer. I ran over so many baby frogs. I wanted to stop and pick some up to take home, but all I have is a wine bottle. I'd hate to explain that to a cop.
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
Randomize