Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
Just fell out of the attic onto the garage floor. Okay but might go for an x ray. Smashed one of the kitchen drawers to bits.
Holy Shit Mom
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize