problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
TONIGHT IS GOING TO BE A FUCKING BLAST. EVEN IF I HAVE TO SET OFF A BUNCH OF FIREWORKS IN YOUR KITCHEN.
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
Hey sorry for calling you so much last night. I mixed your number with the pizza guys, and he was running late
If I don't quit picking up guys when I'm drunk, I'm going to need a vagina transplant.
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
Randomize