that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
So, I ran into Garrett last night in the laundry room.
Oh really? First post break-up run in. How'd it go? Awkward?
Um. We had sex on a washing machine.
If one more dude who finds out I'm a cop asks to see me in uniform I'm gonna become asexual
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