I wanna passion pit in your ass
Please tell me how I woke up out in the middle of nowhere wearing nothing but a hard hat and a man thong?
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
When She took off her bra.... A tube of lipgloss, her phone, I.D. And a wad of twenties fell out.... I'm officially no longer a butt man
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
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