Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I'm dropping a fat deuce at work, and the lock on the stall door slips and the door slides open, when suddenly someone comes in. Now I have two options, I can either get up quickly and try to shut the door quickly (not easy to do with one hand) or I can just sit there and play it off like it's no big deal and I always dump at work with the door open. I chose option two, and it was as awkward as it sounds.
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
there is another microwave in the elevator.
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