Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
Dude, you need to talk to your mom
wtf?
She just called and asked if i would be part of the intervention she's planning for you
Walk of shame was bad enough, but farting with each step as I walked past his roommates was just not cosmically fair.
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
Please stop hiding condoms in my house. If I want to have sex with you, I will let you know. FYI, my mom found the ones hidden behind the milk. She was not happy.
Wow. I grabbed the wrong container to rinse my contacts- it was a beer. And it comes out waaaay faster than saline.
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
Randomize