I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
So when we opened his headboard we found a bottle of crisco sitting on top of his porn magazines.
I guess we all know what he was cookin.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
I feel like this is the moment of high where you have to write these texts down to remember to text them and feel that somehow this is important to the continuity of the world.
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
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