he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
I drove 5 hours to see her. She thanked me by getting shitfaced, inviting her boyfriend over, and making me sleep on the couch after I cooked for them and did the dishes. You're right. I'm a fucking doormat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
I took 20 bucks from you because when I woke up I saw more of you than I ever wanted to see bro.
Totally acceptable.
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
Randomize