On Saturday, I sharted on my roommates dog while trying to make it smell my farts. Today I got security clearance to work for one of the most respected and secretive govt agencies in the US
It's the American dream
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
I have fence marks all over my body
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
Randomize