"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
I apologize for violently hooking up with her in front of you in the jacuzzi last night.
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
Randomize