I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
I accidentally requested the ides of march off instead of st patricks day. Is this an omen? will alcohol be my brutus?
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
Made eye contact with a friendly neighborhood dog walker while violently puking out the window. How's your Wednesday going?
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
The bar brought brought it upon themselves, they played billy joels piano man before closing, it's not our fault the bar isn't a bar anymore, right?
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
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